Why force myself to work? I am not starving and my daughters refuse money. The only REAL reason to submit myself to discipline is that I had promised to deliver for tomorrow morning and I am ashamed of my recurring fake promises and saying sorry.
In fact, I have this ugly policy of deceiving my friends and clients and promise impossible deadlines exactly for that reason, to create a sense of crisis and force myself to work.
The system is not working as it used to. I dont know what to do. How to manage myself. How to motivate my old bones.
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